Wendelien McNicoll | Specialised Counselling at the End of Life
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Specialised Counselling at the End of Life

We all know that one day we too will die, but it is a thought we don’t really like to entertain. Recent research has shown that 71% of British people would rather not talk about dying or death or bereavement. My experience is, though, that when the end of life is near, there are ways to help you decide how to approach this time. You are the person at the helm of your own ship and you can actively participate in having the wind in your sails or, when the need arises, to let the wind carry you.

You will feel this process happening inside you, but your loved ones may find this harder to notice and they may be a little slower in changing tack, even when you are ready to do so. I am alongside you to aid in the communication between you and your loved ones. I can help emotions to surface safely, so you can gently adjust the sails where needed.

My experience, and that of many others who work in this field, is that good communication at this time gives people real peace of mind. You or your loved ones can be overwhelmed by strong feelings, such as anger, fear, loneliness, grief, resignation, regrets and ‘why me’ questions. These feelings hinder clear thinking and take up valuable energy and time.

End of Life Counselling means that, when you are ill, you need to know that you can call on a counsellor who is flexible and who will fit in around you. Because I run a private practice, I can offer that flexibility. I see clients during the week up to 8 pm, or by prior arrangement at the weekend. Because I cannot always be on call, you can leave a message on my mobile or email me and I will get in touch with you. Your illness may cause you to be too tired or unwell for the agreed time, and in that case we will re-arrange our session. We can shorten a session or lengthen it as required.

I am aware of the input of the medical multi-disciplinary team that surrounds you and I will try and fit in seamlessly with them, so you get the best care possible.

I am aware of the effect your illness has on young children and teenagers, and can help you help them because you know your children best. Counselling is a word that children may not understand fully, but their words are often expressed in things like work books, sand play and drawings.

Teenagers do understand the word counselling, but are often reluctant to sit opposite someone and discuss their feelings. Doing an activity with them whilst talking is often more helpful.